Cyber Safety with John Parsons - Week 8

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This week John talks about anti-social behaviour and the importance of having a 'Lighthouse Person' - a person that you both trust, that shares your family values, that your child has permission to contact should they need help for any reason:

How to Deal with Anti-social Behavior Online (click to watch).

Young people often tell me they don’t want to talk to their parents about people that may be abusing them online or offline because of how mum or dad might react. It is important not to over-react if your child tells you about a problem or risk they are dealing with. Young people are more inclined to talk to parents about issues they are dealing with if the parents remain calm, show love, compassion and understanding when the child discloses the issue to them.

Give your child a 'Lighthouse':

Sometimes children may get into situations that are embarrassing for them or so scary they just can’t bring themselves to go directly to the parent. They may even choose not to tell you because they want to protect you.

Let them nominate a person that you both trust, who shares the same values as you, to become their 'Lighthouse person'. The role of the Lighthouse is to be there for your child at any time; day or night, in person or by phone, to listen to them and help them when they need it. Then support the child and accompany them to meet their guardians and talk about what has happened. You should also give the Lighthouse and your child a list of agencies that are specifically set up to listen to children who need advice or help. Sometimes children need to talk to somebody outside of the family circle.

When you actively provide this opportunity for a Lighthouse with your child, you build a safe passage for them back to you and give them permission to get help when they might need it.

Important information:

Call 111 in emergencies. If you can’t decide whether it’s a real emergency and you’re still worried, call 105 and ask the Police. They will help you work out what to do. You could also contact www.netsafe.org.nz if you have concerns about your child’s use of Information Communication Technology. Sometimes a chat on the phone with an expert is all it requires to solve a problem or relieve a concern.

For more information and resources you can also visit the JMC Health Hub page.

About John:

John Parsons is a New Zealand based Cyber Safety and Risk Assessment Consultant who works with education, health and private sectors, providing specialist advice and direction on the safe and ethical use of Digital Communication Technology. John is a published author of “Keeping Your Children Safe Online” and a social commentator who works throughout New Zealand and Internationally.

John Parsons

Safeguarding Children and Adults Online

www.citizen21.co.nz